More prettier

This feeling inside me, I can’t describe.

This is what it must feel like to feel hurt

My heart feels stuck

Is it pumping blood?

This feeling inside of me, I can’t describe.

Am I depressed?

I don’t feel beautiful

My hair Isn’t blonde

What’s wrong?

I can’t describe

My arms feel weak

My chest feels cold on the outside

Warm on the inside

My eyes are tearing consistently

I feel like my confidence is gone

No hope.

My nose is too big

I’m not skinny

My teeth aren’t straight

My hair isn’t rapunzel

And my eyes aren’t diamond shaped

I’ve never gotten a compliment to

Run on about with a smile

Am I feeling nauseous?

I really need help.

I’m stuck on one song on the playlist

On repeat.

Im in deep thought

So deep it can cut down into my arteries.

I don’t know what I’m thinking

And I really don’t know how I’m feeling

I’m mad, sad, hurt for no reason even sleepy.

Am I bipolar?

I feel like over dosing but sadly that isn’t

The cure, it won’t solve my problem.

Or is it even a problem?

Maybe i’m just in an uncomfortable position

that makes me feel very closed in

If I take a look in the mirror

will I see an hideous mistake?

I have no one to blame but myself,

because I didn’t believe in myself

I allowed others opinions to cutt my skin from the inside

but I know what and who I am.

I am a human being just like you

and I know If I look deep down inside

I can see how beautiful and smart I am

An intelligent unmiserable person.

I don’t need make up, weave, money or a nice body to feel happy about me.

Maybe this was all just a fear I’ve never overcame.

I will always be me

And I will always be beautiful

I am pretty again

Even if you never think so

For I am a child of a king and queen

Copyright© Kiah-kay Holman, 2015

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2 thoughts on “More prettier

  1. Now that I know i’m beautiful, I can go out in the open with out minding the stares. People haven’t stop staring since I had my face surgery. I had a massive tumor growing on my eye. Now that it’s gone, im beautiful again because you said! I am beautiful because im not scared of what they say. Keep it up poetrybykiah! I look forward to more!

    Like

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